So far so good

So I've started at Subway. I fear I have forgotten more than I thought, however, I am remembering quickly.

What is it about a full moon that makes people act strange? I don't get it. Every month around the full moon, which happens to coinside with my girly time every month, Delyah becomes a giant pain in my butt. Now, I know what your thinking. It's nothing to do with the full moon or Delyah, it's me, right?

NO!!!!!!

At Dell we use to keep calanders to track the full moon so we knew if we needed extra cookies/donuts/coffee for those couple days. People would become complete asses. Worse than usual, anyway!
Anyway
Delyah has been on one lately. Into everything, and trying to mother Aiden to the point of being obnoxious. She really means well, but she's 2. Meaning well and doing well are nowhere near the same thing most of the time!

So we're getting ready to moving in with Andy's parents. Gotta get some debt paid off, get some money saved up. We just can't keep living paycheck to paycheck every month anymore. Those paychecks aren't meeting anymore! It will definately be an adjustment, but we'll all be ok. Hell, when school starts in January I'll never be there anyway! I think it will go well, though. His mom and I get along well, and I love her to death, so we'll be all right. If all else fails I'll stock up on good books and hibernate for the winter. That actually doesn't sound half bad anyway. Hmmm - good books. Suggestions?

My schedule

Come January my schedule will look something like this...
Monday:
9:00 - 9:50 Anthropology 102 with James Woods
10:00 - 10:50 Psychology 101 with Randy Simonson
11:00 - 11:50 English 101 with Shelley McEuen
rest of the day clear for homework and family
Tuesday:
9:30 - 10:50 Math 015 with Thomas Atkin
rest of the day clear for homework and family
Wednesday:
9:00 - 9:50 Anthropology 102 with James Woods
10:00 - 10:50 Psychology 101 with Randy Simonson
11:00 - 11:50 English 101 with Shelley McEuen
7 - 9 Pep Band with Steve Cox
Thursday:
9:30 - 10:50 Math 015 with Thomas Atkin
11:00 - 4:00 homework and family
4:00 - 10:30 work
Friday:
9:00 - 9:50 Anthropology 102 with James Woods
10:00 - 10:50 Psychology 101 with Randy Simonson
11:00 - 11:50 English 101 with Shelley McEuen
12:00 - 4:00 homework and family
4:00 - 10:30 work
Saturday:
10:00 - 11:40 yoga
12:00 - 4:00 homework and family
4:00 - 10:30 work
Sunday:
work
:repeat:

gonna be busy!!! but I'm ok with that :)

Eat Fresh

So I'm back at Subway. It's really hard to be the bottom of the totum pole after being on top. I accepted an Assistant Manager position at the Subway on Blue Lakes. It will work out with school better, too. I'll be able to take classes M-F until noon, study and hang with my kids noon to 5ish, and work 5-10ish. That's a busy busy schedule, BUT, it's for the better good. I should be able to last at that rate for a year or so before I collapse!!! Naw, Andy had a good point in suggesting I take the summer semester off so I don't burn out. I plan on doing just that, so no worries there.

Band is going well. I love it!

I get to register for classes on Monday. I can't freaking wait! I'm going to take Anthropology 102, Math 015 (I suck at Math!!! haha), English 101, Psychology 101, and Yoga on Saturday mornings. And Pep Band, of course. so the way I figured it to be, I have class from 9 - 12:50 Mon/Wed/Fri and 11-12:20 Tus/Thurs. Yoga 10-11:40 on Saturday. That still leaves me tons of time for homework and family and work, right?

I'm so stoked, can ya tell?!?! hahahaha

Happy Halloween all!

Little of this, little of that

Things are still going fairly well. Not making near enough at Arctic Circle to make it worth my while, but every little bit helps.

I am getting all my stuff together to be a full time student starting Spring semester. Classes start January 15th, 2010. It feels nutty to even type 2010. Are we calling it twenty-ten or two-thousand-ten? What about two-oh-one-oh? Meh, whatever.
So school...
I am enrolled in CSI's pep band. That grants me $250 scholarship right there. Heck yes!! It feels great to play with an ensemble again. It's been 7 years since I graduated high school, and I haven't played since. I definitely have some catching up to do, but for the most part it's like riding a bike. For me, anyway.
When I did my FASFA I was told I was eligible for $5,350 in a Pell Grant. I got an e-mail today saying that CSI was done reviewing my financial aid and would discuss my awards as soon as I register for classes. Registration starts November 2nd. I think I will jump on that like flies on shit. I want the best classes and teachers I can get. May as well go in head first and get the best I can for my fresh start!
I really hope this works out ok, though. An old friend of mine said it best - I dive in head first and don't bother to check the depth of the water. Sometimes it's deep enough, sometimes it was only 3 inches deep. OOpS! I have a pretty good feeling that this will all end out for the best for us, though. I mean, how else am I going to get anywhere other than were I am? I mean, I love my family and my life, but I am still naive enough to believe that there is more than living paycheck to paycheck in an apartment that's too small. I still believe that I can be anything I want to be, an astronaut, a doctor, a firefighter, even the President of the United States! OK - so who am I kidding? I'll never be a firefighter, that takes too much stamina, and I don't have ANY intentions of quitting smoking anytime soon, if ever. Hey, ya gotta die somehow, why not die doing something you enjoy? I, for one, enjoy my smokes. Sometimes it's the only periodic 5 minutes throughout my day that I can truely call my own, between work, 2 demanding children, and running a household! Now school! Naw, Andy is great help, he just works so much, and so many night shifts.
Yet another reason to go to school. If I can get a good enough job after I graduate, he can be a stay at home dad, house-husband, and we'll see each other SO MUCH MORE than we do now, and I'll NEVER have to do LAUNDRY AGAIN!!!!!!
*sigh*
I love having 2 sleeping children and a [mostly] clean house!
Good day, my friends :)

Been awhile...

Been awhile since I blogged, thought it was about time for an update.

I'm having mixed feelings about leaving Dell a week earlier than the site closing. Although the severance package would have been nice, at least I have a job and am not fighting 500 other people in town looking for one. Oh well.
Arctic Circle is ok for now. I'm hoping like crazy to get all my ducks in a row and become a full time student this spring semester. No time like the present to go to school and get something of a degree to pay bills with! Never going to amount to more than a too small apartment and living paycheck to paycheck at the rate we're currently going. Can't think of any other debt to take on, either, than student loans, and have it be OK.

Kids are doing great, Delyah astounds me every day with something new she knows. She never stops talking! Aiden is discoverig his voice. He's turned into quite the chunk since his surgery. He's sitting in the 98% for weight and 93% for height. At 4 months he's outgrowing his 6 month clothes. Atta boy!

taking Aiden to the dr

So my mom mentioned a few days ago that Aiden doesn't look very good and that some of the women at her store also agree, that he "looks like he's not thriving". Great choice of words. It got me thinking, though, and he does look a bit thin and gangly. I had been chalking it up to Andy being so slender, but Aiden is just a baby and has no baby fat! So I borrowed my mother in laws letter scale and used a system we'd used about 3 weeks ago to weigh him. He is 8 pounds 9 ounces. He should have gained a pound by now, and he is 1 ounce less than his birthweight. That's troublesome. So I call the hospital and have them page my doctor (whom I had tried to get in touch with at his office that morning). He calls back and after hearing about how skinny he is and not holding anything down, and yes I've tried the formula for fussy babies, and yes I've tryed Soy, he pulls our chart. Says to call first thing in the morning and we WILL get him in. Seemed a bit torked at his secretary, too. I do have to say in her defense, when I called it was to request a note to let me go back to work on Monday, and that I was concerned about my sons weight. At that time I didn't know he was still an ounce short of his birthweight. They are suppose to gain a 1/2 ounce a day, so by 5 weeks he should definately be at least a pound more!

I've been worried sick about the poor little guy, he just lays there with this sad look on his face and I can't fix it! I don't know what's worse, to be him and helpless or to have him look at me with those sad little eyes and not be able to help him! The doctors office should be open in a couple hours though.

Getting use to 2 instead of 1

So while Emily and Charlie were here helping me with Delyah and Aiden we took the kids to Hop 2 It to let them run off some energy. Delyah and Charlie are so cute together, I couldn't resist posing some pictures! All of them are posted on my facebook though.

<--- Delyah and Charlie are trying to figure out how to get on the big slide

Delyah and my foot on said 'big slide' --->

<--- Charlie was making baskets while Delyah chewed on balls.

The Ball pit!!! Both kids went nuts over this place.

Aiden is here!

So I had a great blog written up last night, complete with pictures and cute captions and all that jazz, but I got distracted, it never got posted, and now it's not here. So today I am being lazy and just posting some pictures! Aiden was born at 8 pounds, 10 ounces and 21 1/2 inches long. He was just barely smaller than Delyah, who came into the world at 8 pounds, 15 ounces and 22 inches. Good thing he can hold his own, though! Big sister is a lot for a little guy to handle! =)

I realized I need my own rant after reading and posting on "Brown Town", Lisa and Joel's blog! So much of what they are going through right now is what I'm about to go through! Minus the HUGE premature baby incident, we have a lot of the same stuff going on.

I worry a lot about how Delyah and Aiden will get along. Right now D thinks babies are the bee's knees, but will she think so when she can't carry Aiden around? She goes into little hitting fits right now, especially when she's being disciplined or getting tired. It's not a huge deal for her to hit Andy and I, she doesn't do it hard, she's 2, but for a new little baby it's another story!

I wonder what my life will be like trying to take care of a week old baby and a busy 2 year old by myself after Andy goes back to work. We are already always coming and going in opposite directions, it's going to be so hard to do this! I'd feel horrible for waking him up at night for help when he's working and I'm off, but at the same time I'll be so exhausted I won't know my up from down anymore. I don't remember a lot of the first few weeks with D, just being so exhausted.

Speaking of not remembering much from D's first few weeks, I'm scared of how to take care of this baby! I had so much constant help from my mom and dad (constructive AND otherwise) that I'm scared to do it by myself. Andy has even less experience than I do! About my only saving peace of mind is my mother-in-law just down the street whose an RN. She has been quite handy in the past, and I don't expect much different this go around! When all else fails she's a phone call away, which is a lot more than I can say for my own mother!

I know we'll get through it all ok, I just worry. A lot. But that's what Andy's for, to calm me down! Too bad he still has 5 more hours to his shift :(

Delta and poo

So work goes surprisingly smooth today, considering the main tool we use for, oh, everything, Dellserv, got replaced today. Yep, that's right. For those of you who use to hear promises of Dellserv replacements, it's happened! As of today! So relatively chill day, all things considered. I held it together quite well.

I get off work and head to the grocery store to pick up a few things and fill a prescription, no big deal. Ready to get home, that's for sure. Get home to find out my blonde self left my prescription in the cart - in the store. So I waddle my pregnant butt back to the store and find it, feeling all the while like an incompetent idiot who has no right to be bringing children into the world when I can't keep track of my own stuff.

I get home and my daughter had thrown the fit from hell when I left again, so my husband laid her down. She wasn't sleeping, just finding her reset button (which consists of resting and a baba). I lay down and just start crying. My husband isn't ready for work and has to leave in the next 1/2 hour. Another day we don't get to see each other, and I get even more emotional because I wish he'd be ready when I get home so we'd get to spend that 1/2 hour together instead of a hug and kiss as he walks out the door. Again, stupid minor little things.

I start to get over it all with the help of a Big Boy ice cream sandwich. Leave it to ice cream and chocolate to cure a preggo's tears. Delyah starts to get a bit fussy in her room so I brace myself to wrestle a 2 year old for the evening alone. I open her bedroom door and whew buddy! That kid can't say her poop don't stink!

I grab a diaper, some wipes, chase her into a corner so I can catch her to change her diaper. I unbutton a row of buttons to find her diaper wasn't securely fastened and there is literally poo all up and down her legs and her cloths.

Ew

I put it all back together, and head strait to the bathroom and start the bathtub. After getting her mostly cleaned up and in the bath playing happily I turn to clean up the cloths and start the washer - only to find out the majority of the poo fell out of the diaper when I was whisking it off her little butt and out of her reach and had since been crushed into the bathroom rug by me while getting Delyah into the bathtub.


That's just what I needed. On top of all the other stuff from today!!!

So I get EVERYTHING all cleaned up. My cloths, her cloths, the bathroom rug, get them all in the washer. I get her clean cloths and a diaper and a couple towels to lay her on when I pull her out of the bathtub - and she's throwing her bath toys out of the tub, full of water and all. That's when mommy decides bath time is most defiantly over.

You would have thought I fought World War 3 with that kid! Water everywhere, she screamed bloody murder and flailed herself all over the floor before getting this vacant look in her eyes and starts close fist punching herself in the face. I know I don't have it as bad as some moms whose kids bang their heads into walls and such, but maybe, just maybe that paint she's eating off the wall in her room is getting to her. (that's a story for another time)

So by this time hell has strait up frozen over, so mommy decides it's bedtime. Less than 2 minutes of crying and that little girl is out cold. All this within a 2 hour time span!

Whew - what a day! And to do it all alone, 8 months pregnant!

Hop 2 It

I heard about this place from a co-worker with a little girl just a touch younger than Delyah. I thought it sounded amazing! It's a play place for kids. I've heard of these places in bigger cities, so you can imagine my delight to find something here, in Twin Falls of all places! Turns out it is right around the corner from my appartment. I can literally see the building from my bedroom window! They just have all these jump houses, with one designed for kids 4 and under only.

Delyah spent most of her time between that house and the ball pit!  

At one point I went down the slide with Delyah - and quickly learned that pregnant mom's need to have daddies with them for such things!

  We played in the pit for awhile, but it didn't take too long for me to loose my patience with the other kids thinking it was ok to throw the balls at me since I was the "big kid". Those plastic balls can really sting!!! 

 After that I let Delyah go down the slide by herself and a very nice understanding mom lifted her back out when she got fussy!

All in all it was a lot of fun, but she sure looked little compared to those other kids! I'm so use to her being the biggest kid around, or at least the same size as the rest of my friends' kids.  Note to self - don't go on a Saturday afternoon! Definately worth the $5 admission - and parents are free! (and get to play too)

 

Incubus

(Stellar)
Meet me in outer space
I will hold you close
If you're afraid of heights
I need you to see this place
It might be the only way 
That I can show you how 
It feels to be inside of you

(I Miss You)
To see you when I wake up 
Is a gift I didn't think could be real
To know that you feel the same as I do 
Is a three-fold utopian dream

(Warning)
Bat your eyes girl
Be otherworldly
Count your blessings
Seduce a stranger
What's so wrong with being happy?
Kudos to those who see through sickness
When she woke in the morning
She knew that her life had passed her by
And she called out a warning
Don't ever let life pass you by
I suggest we learn to love ourselves
Before it's made illegal
When will we learn?
When will we change?
Just in time to see it all fall down
Those left standing will make millions
Writing books on the way it should have been
When she woke in the morning
She knew that her life had passed her by
And she called out a warning
Don't ever let life pass you by
Floating in this cosmic jacuzzi
We are like frogs oblivious
To the water starting to boil
No one flinchesWe all float face down
When she woke in the morning
She knew that her life had passed her by
And she called out a warning
Don't ever let life pass you by

(Drive)
Sometimes, I feel the fear of uncertainty stinging clear
And I can't help but ask myself how much I'll let the fear 
Take the wheel and steer
It's driven me before
And it seems to have a vague, haunting mass appeal
But lately I am beginning to find that I
Should be the one behind the wheel
Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there
With open arms and open eyes
So if I decide to waiver my chance to be one of the hive 
Will I choose water over wine and hold my own and drive? 
It's driven me before 
And it seems to be the way that everyone else gets around
But lately I'm beginning to find that 
When I drive myself my light is found
So whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there 
With open arms and open eyes
Would you kill the Queen to crush the hive? 
Would you choose water over wine
Hold the wheel and drive?  

Family really is everything

Been a rough couple of weeks for me. Andy and I have been fighting, but we are doing MUCH better now. I got in a fight with one of my best friends who in no uncertain terms told me where I can shove it. Tonight I found out someone from my family has to have all meals with my grandma as she can no longer feed herself and the home she is in is a bit understaffed so they need us to help. 

Is it wrong to want her to die? She doesn't remember hardly anyone in the family anymore, she can't dress herself, bath, or use the bathroom by herself. Now she can't feed herself. Really, wouldn't everyone be better if she was gone? She is a believer, so she has God to go to. The family can stop watching her die. Is that just horrible? I'd much rather she be my grandma, who makes the best biscuits and gravey EVER. Who use to make me do my homework, and we'd watch soap operas and sit in her hot tub and put together puzzles. But if she can't do anything anymore, what's the point?